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The 2004 Olympic Games are over. The Bahamas won.

Election date is October 9.

Howard had made it pretty clear the announcement would come this weekend, repeatedly refusing to give a straight answer to questions about whether Parliament would sit next week. And with the Labor Party threatening to reconvene a Senate inquiry into the “children overboard” affair, and to subpoena government staffers, it’s not surprising that Howard wanted to get his sorry arse to Yarralumla before they got the chance.

He’s a liar and a coward. Now let’s vote the evil little fucker into oblivion.

Taking a closer look at the war medals of George W. Bush.

Dr Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, the author of On Death and Dying, is dead. I hope she had a pleasant transition through the five stages – denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.

Like a lot of my fellows, I read her famous book in those dark days when we were all facing certain death at an uncertain time. I know her ideas have borne some criticism over the years, but I dare say she helped a lot of people come to terms with the scariest reality of all.

“When I die I’m going to dance first in all the galaxies… I’m gonna play and dance and sing.” It’s hippie bullshit, I know, but good for her.

Is is just me, or does this illustration of the first day of David Hicks’ trial seem a little weird?

The Sydney Morning Herald site (from which it comes) notes that it is the work of a pool artist assigned to the trial, and has the caption:

David Hicks, centre, as his defence counsel US Marine Corps Maj Michael Mori, standing, puts his hand on Hicks’ shoulder before a military commission at Guantanamo Naval Base, August 25, 2004. Court illustration: Pool

The thing I noticed (apart from the “APPROVED” stamp) is that all the military brass sitting in judgment of Australia’s alleged Taliban fighter are faceless. No doubt this is to protect their identities, but it seems strangely fitting for this Kangaroo Court to be headed by faceless men.

The composition is fairly well-finessed, and the gentle hand of Hick’s military lawyer, Major Michael Mori, on the accused’s shoulder, combined with the well-observed distress on the faces of Hicks’ parents at the left of the scene, seems a touching counterpoint to the sterile, featureless faces of his accusers.

I do wonder why Hicks’ face is obscured. His identity is well-known and there are plenty of photographs of him going around. The figure in the drawing doesn’t really bear any resemblance to any of the photographs I’ve seen (here, for example). I don’t suppose he looks the same after three years in US military custody in any case, but the obliteration of his facial features seems odd.

Hicks has pleaded not guilty this morning to “conspiracy to commit war crimes, aiding the enemy and attempted murder”. His legal team are actively challenging the legitimacy of the military commission.

The full SMH story has more details.

Fearful of upsetting stupid students who receive school work covered in red ink, stupid teachers are switching to purple:

“If you see a whole paper of red, it looks pretty frightening,” said Sharon Carlson, a health and physical education teacher at John F. Kennedy Middle School in Northampton. “Purple stands out, but it doesn’t look as scary as red.”

Obviously, marking papers and tests with invisible ink is the way of the future. Or perhaps giving everyone an A, in order to head off lawsuits for nervous shock brought about by “scary” red marks.

A mix of red and blue, the color purple embodies red’s sense of authority but also blue’s association with serenity, making it a less negative and more constructive color for correcting student papers, color psychologists said. Purple calls attention to itself without being too aggressive. And because the color is linked to creativity and royalty, it is also more encouraging to students.

“Color psychologists”?!?! Puh-lease!

Australia continues to do well at the Olympics, and is slowly climbing up the buggery.org true medal tally – the Aussies are now in 7th place. Slovenia, Belarus and Cuba are in the lead.

Australia’s women’s eights rowing team looks set to capture the sore loser/bad sportsmanship award, after some members of the team abused and threatened rower Sally Robbins who collapsed during the final. Australia was out of medal contention at the time and did not finish after Robbins collapsed from exhaustion. Apparently her team-mates threatened to throw Robbins – who was “paralyzed with pain” into the water.

Shame, shame, shame.

Spring is in the air. The sun is staying up that little bit longer, the days are getting that little bit warmer, and the birds and bees are doing that thing they do:

I stumbled across this blossoming cherry tree and its payload of marauding bees on the way home from the hospital today.

I was at the hospital – the Alfred, in Commercial Road – on business, doing an interview with an infectious diseases doctor who has been instrumental in setting up the Australian HIV/AIDS Brain Bank. (You can read all about it in the next edition of Positive Living).

I was a little nervous about going to the Alfred – today was the first time I’d set foot in there for about ten years, but I used to know the place like the back of my hand. The Alfred was the hospital that Daren cooled his heels on several occasions before he checked out in October ‘94.

The impending tenth anniversary of Daren’s death has been on my mind a bit this year, and moving to Melbourne has only amplified that thinking. It will be tough to face the passing of that anniversary in October: Daren was the first great love of my life and, honestly, I miss him every day.

But the Alfred, I’m happy to report, felt very different and it wasn’t too hard to be there. Time heals.

Speaking of heels, I bought my wedding outfit on the weekend. And we bought wedding rings. Blimey, looks like I’m getting married.

Finally, can I briefly skite about having made the A list – at last:

Nothing like receiving an envelope with the vice-regal coronet stamped in gold to brighten your day. Pity I can’t make the do.

As promised threatened, the Olympic medal tallies are now on their own page and will be updated daily or thereabouts between now and the closing ceremony.

At the moment, Estonia, Georgia and Belarus are leading the tally, having edged out Cuba who had the early lead. Trinidad and Tobago, Croatia, Mongolia and Eritrea are all in with a chance. Australia is 9th, the USA is 47th, and China is 56th, so I must be doing something right.

I’m (cautiously) open to suggestions of other ways to fiddle the data, even if those suggestions are shameless attempts to get your country onto the top of the ladder. (But try to be reasonable; I don’t think there’s much interest in ratings “by number of maple leaves on flag” or “gross domestic sheep meat production”).

Feedback, discussion, etc is very much invited.

Update: all the medal tallies, update regularly, here.

The Olympics being half over now, it seems like a good time to see how the medal tally’s looking. You’ve probably seen the medal tally around the place, and perhaps unsurprisingly, it’s the big, rich countries — the United States, China and Russia — who are leading the charge.

As of this morning, the top countries are as shown in the table at right.

Assuming for a moment that the Olympic medal tally is meant to show the relative sporting success of the competing coutries, it seems to me there’s a few problems with this table.

Of course America is on top. As well as having the world’s biggest chip on their shoulder, they have a huge population and buckets of money. But if an American athlete wins a gold medal, does it really mean more than if, say, a Nauruan won a bronze? Nauru is a country with fewer than 10,000 population, and they’re so broke it’s not funny.

So, with that in mind, let’s fiddle with the numbers a bit.

(more…)

Why does Nate’s flatmate wear that burqa? Who does she work for? Where can I get one of those robotic litter boxes with the bidet mod? All this and more.

Coming back to the affair of Governor “I am an American knob polisher” McGreevey, has anyone stopped to ask how it came to pass that the Governor of a US state appointed a foreign national as his “homeland security adviser”? I notice that Golan “Heights” Cipel has returned to his family home in Israel.

According to this report on gay.com (yeah, I know, gay.com…) Cipel is a “poet and former tour guide” whose “appointment was widely criticised for [his] lack of experience”.

So, let me see if I have this right: chisel-jawed, impeccably-groomed governor of New Jersey appoints foreign, broad-shouldered, tanned, poet/guide (and alleged Mossad agent) to highly-paid and highly sensitive post in his administration, and the two start going at it like rutting dogs. No-one in the administration makes a fuss. Governor’s wife doesn’t notice when Governor comes home from homeland security meetings with hair all matted with semen. Extortion attempt leads to governor’s resignation and the closet case is then feted as some kind of gay American hero.

Do you think the film rights are still available?

Jim, commenting on an earlier post, asks about the electoral system in Australia. He doesn’t know this, but he’s opening a can of worms.

Eh, maybe it’s me, but I’ve always found the parliamentary system better than the strange brew we have in the States.

Here’s my ignorance: UK has a five-year maximum term, and I think Canada’s is five years also. What is it in Australia?

Federal terms are a maximum three years in Oz, but there’s an ongoing debate about whether fixed four-year terms would be a better option. Some states (eg. NSW) have made this change.

That answers your question, but you know I can’t resist the opportunity to discourse about the Australian electoral system at length. (more…)

Near the Royal Exhibition Building
this morning
in the winter sunshine
I saw…

…a fountain…

…gambolling nymphs…

…cockatoos and platypuses…

…and goannas.

Sometimes it’s the simple things that make you smile.

(Click the small images above for close-ups. The Royal Exhibition Building recently won World Heritage Listing status.)

“I am a gay American.” What sort of dumb phraseology is that? Instead of cleverly mixing the patriotic and the homoerotic, it comes across as “Yeah, I take it up the poop-chute, but at least I ain’t no commie.”

New Jersey Governor James McGreevy may well be American, but is he actually gay? Obviously he digs cock, but last time I checked, being “gay” meant having some kind of gay identity, and unless McCreepy has some further revelations about being a drag queen in his spare time, I reckon he’s having a lend by claiming the “gay” tag.

Admittedly, “I am a closet cocksucker American” doesn’t have quite the same ring to it, but I think you’ve got to do more than lust after your Israeli Security Adviser’s perfectly-formed bubble butt before you can help yourself to membership of my community.

Meanwhile, rumours are flowing thick and fast that McGreevy was in fact the target of a failed Mossad honeytrap operation. As I understand it, Mossad is placing square-jawed, perfectly tanned, broad-shouldered agents with flawless dental work into the offices of most US politicians, where they will inevitably become involved in sexual relations of one sort or another.

These are the same Mossad operatives you see shadowing the impressive bulk of Ariel Sharon as he moves between KFC, Pizza Hut and the headquarters of the Likud party. Devilishly handsome, physically striking, and expertly trained in hand-to-hand combat, interrogation techniques and swallowing the (kosher) pork sword. Not a gag reflex between the lot of them, and utterly irresistible – if twice-married father-of-two McGreevy was unable to control himself when Golan Cipel bent over to pick up that security report he “accidentally” dropped, who can?

So, Governor McGravy, you’re not gay, you’re just tragic.

[Thanks Bernard]

Howard arrives in Gunnedah last night (ABC Photo)

The Scrafton allegations continue to dominate federal politics. Scrafton has now undergone a lie detector test which he reckons vindicates his claims, and he’s challenged Howard to do the same.

Howard, not surprisingly, isn’t coming to the polygraph party.

“I will submit myself to the great lie detector test in Australian politics and that is the collective judgment of my fellow Australians,” he said.

OK, fine, but when? Get on with it, you grub, so your “fellow Australians” can have their say.

The Labor Party ought to be having a field day with these allegations. After all, Howard lied his way back into office three years ago – what does that do for (a) his credibility and (b) the legitimacy of the last three years? Howard’s in deep shit: he knows it, we know it, presumably the Labor Party knows it, but what are they doing? Humming and hawing about a new Senate inquiry.

Someone needs to write Latham some angry soundbytes. He needs to call the Prime Minister for what he is – a desperate, double-dealing grub. He lied his way into office in 2001 and he’ll do it again. He should resign. He won’t, of course.

How about this for a political gambit, Mr L? If, after he leaves office, Howard is shown to have deliberately misled the Australian people, Labor will pass special legislation to strip him of his pension, or at least the part of it he earned, illegitimately, in the last three years. If it’s good enough for Richard Butler, it’s good enough for Howard.

That should scare the shit out of Howard and it will be immensely popular with the punters.

Update: There’s excellent op-ed pieces in all the morning papers, and all have pulled out their respective big guns: Michelle Grattan in The Age, Paul Kelly in the Oz and Alan Ramsey in the SMH.

From “God’s Word endorsing Gay Marriage declared in the year 2000: Chronicles of God’s Prophet“:

In June 2004 I was in my room in North Park, San Diego, with my friend Vincent. While we were sitting on my futon I asked him, and God, if I could give him a gift. He agreed and I said,”Ok, relax.” and placed my hands upon him.

Then I said, “open your mind and just relax” and as he relaxed I induced my spirit into his and witnessed the Wrath of God along with the Holy Spirit introduce it’s self into his body. Then he asked, “What is it?” and I said, “it’s the Holy Spirit”. Then we both relaxed and when I sat up from the futon so did he right behind me.

The Canadian government has announced that it will cease all opposition to same-sex marriages and will not oppose a hearing to be held in the Supreme Court in October, opening the door to legalisation of same-sex marriages in the nine remaining provinces and territories.

WINNIPEG—The last federal barrier to same-sex marriage and divorce collapsed in dramatic fashion yesterday, with Justice Minister Irwin Cotler offering a blanket assurance that Ottawa will no longer stonewall or resist applications. [Toronto Star]

Same-sex marriage is currently legal in three provinces – Ontario, British Columbia and Québec – and and the Yukon territory.

I’ve just upgraded my Movable Type installation to v3, and I’m mucking about with templates, styles and stuff. So if things look like shit, that’s why. Once I’m done, I’ll delete this post and if things still look like shit, it’ll be because I’m thick.

Update: all done now. Lemme know if anything looks crap.

Have I been remiss in not yabbering at length about the Olympic Games? I do try to be topical here but there’s so much action at home that I get few opportunities to turn my attention to the global sporting stage.

Speaking of action, when do the men’s gymnastics start? I’m grateful to Hans for alerting me to the existence of Blaine Wilson, a member of the US team:

You know, here at buggery.org we don’t do a lot of gratuitous posting of photographs of spunky gymnasts. We could probably try harder.

Meanwhile, I’ve been sitting up late at night watching the kinds of sports one never gets the opportunity to waste one’s time watching. Handball, fencing, dressage, that sort of thing. (more…)

Some right-wing blogger has suggested the creation of a “League of Good Nations” made up of the world’s nice, white, well-behaved countries (US, UK, Israel, Australia, etc) to replace the UN. Over at Sadly, No! there’s a great thread asking for naming suggestions.

Some highlights:

• Honkistan
• The Ultimate Good Guys of Supremacy and Superiority, Of Which Your Swarthy Country Will Never Be
• The White Man’s Burden Cryogenic Conservation Society
• Countries Divided By A Common Language
• The Coalition Of Countries Who Have Accepted Jesus As Their Personal Savior. And New Zealand. (TCOCWHAJATPSANZ)

[via Hans]

Somehow this seems the right background music as we witness Howard and his cronies desperately twisting the truth, shifting in their seats and generally trying to bullshit themselves back into power.

Lied der Partei (c. 1950), Ernst Busch. (MP3 file if you want to save a copy)

Lyrics (”The Party, the Party, is always right…”) are in the extended entry. This file will be available for a limited time only.
(more…)

The Prime Minister faces a new assault on his integrity as inconsistencies emerge in his defence against claims that he deliberately misled the public over the “children overboard” affair. [SMH today]

Ken Parish points out that blogger Robert Corr was the first to expose the rampant inconsistencies in Howard’s explanation of events.

The punditry seems united now in predicting, given recent lousy polls for Howard and the shit now starting to stick, that we won’t have an election soon after all. Despite his three years being up in December, Howard could theoretically hang on as long as April next year before having to go to the polls. The ABC’s Antony Green has produced a useful guide to the possible dates.

(Those of you visiting from non-Westminster countries will undoubtedly find all this argy-bargy about election dates rather opaque and quaint, but it’s true: in Australia (and the UK, Canada, New Zealand, etc.) the Prime Minister decides the day of his/her own execution. Many people, me included, would prefer fixed terms, but you have to admit it gives the pundits material to work with.)

Back to the matter at hand, it appears there were four witnesses to at least one of the phone conversations between Scrafton and Howard: Mrs Howard, the PM’s Chief of Staff (Arthur Sinodinos), his press secretary (Tony O’Leary), and a senior adviser (Tony Nutt). According to the Herald:

Last night, two of those witnesses backed Mr Howard’s account. However, they said no notes were taken and none of the calls were taped.

So now they’re a pack of liars.

File this under “remarkable, but hardly surprising”:

Mike Scrafton, a former adviser to then defence minister Peter Reith, says he had three telephone conversations with the Prime Minister on November 7, 2001, telling him that the government claims that children were thrown into the sea by asylum seekers were false.

Mr Scrafton says he told the Prime Minister that a tape of the incident “certainly didn’t support the proposition that the event had occurred”.

He says he told Mr Howard “that no-one in defence that I had dealt with on the matter still believed any children were thrown overboard”. The adviser says he also told the PM that photographs released during the debate were not of children thrown into the water.

“I spoke to him again telling him that we didn’t believe the event actually happened,” Mr Scrafton said.

The day after Mr Scrafton says he briefed Mr Howard, the Prime Minister continued to say it did happen.

Howard is a filthy lying bastard. If there’s anyone left in this country who doesn’t believe that Howard is a small-minded racist opportunist who will do anything, trample over anyone, use any opportunity, to perpetuate his desperate grip on power, this report should disabuse them of the notion.

Howard lied. He lied to you and he lied to me. He used these poor desperate people’s lives for his own political advantage. He is the worst leader this country ever had. Ever.

Blub … blub … blub. My poor brain is fried after three days of meetings in Sydney (yes, it’s Sunday, and yes, I’ve been locked in a small room with too little oxygen for the best part of the weekend.)

Again I’m jotting this down from the relative splendour of an airport, this time in Sydney, en route back to home and hearth.

A few observations while I wait for my flight to be called:

The opening ceremony of the Olympic Games was very nice, at least the bits of it I saw in between meetings was. Much of the discussion in this part of the world has been on whether the ceremony was as good as the Sydney games’. Well, it was different, so these comparisons are odious, and it’s hard to be objective when the Sydney Olympics are being discussed, but I think the Athenians excelled themselves.

Many of my queer friends wonder openly when Ian Thorpe will come out. Not anytime soon, I reckon. Whether he’s gay, straight or just nicely groomed, it must be tough having the hopes and dreams of a nation (Jana Pittman’s torn ligaments notwithstanding) resting on your shoulders. I hope he wins a bunch of medals.

The PM hasn’t made the trip to Yarralumla this weekend, so the highly-fancied putative election date of 18 September seems to be off the cards. I’m getting bored with waiting. Howard should make his bloody mind up.

My boyfriend tells me he has agreed to participate in the annual Slave Auction at the Laird Hotel, for charity. I’m taking up a collection. Send money now.

My “get fucked” letter in the Star Observer seems to have been read by all and sundry. Nice to have been the one to inject a little levity into this debate. There was a protest rally in Sydney yesterday, which I couldn’t attend as I was in a meeting, but which drew only a few hundred participants. People don’t care about this issue. People are stupid. This debate is not about gay marriage; this debate is about equality.

Gotta go get on a plane. More soon.

A ban on gay marriages has been given priority over new terrorism laws, sparking claims that the Howard Government is “soft on terror but hard on homosexuals“.

Did the ant-gay marriage law pass the Senate last night? I have to admit I do not know but I assume it did. Despite being only #4 on the Senate notice paper yesterday, the Bill hadn’t been reached before question time, which is when I stopped listening. I had meant to check in last night but never got around to it.

Off to Sydney today for the weekend (work, not pleasure, alas). Writing this from the airport in Melbourne (I <heart> wireless hotspots, even at the extortionate rate of $5 for 15 minutes…)

The Stairway Suite is a series of orchestral variations on the classic 1970’s song by Led Zeppelin, Stairway to Heaven. If you’ve ever wondered what this song would sound like if it had been composed by Franz Schubert, Gustav Holst, Glenn Miller, Gustav Mahler, Georges Bizet and/or Ludwig Van Beethoven (and who hasn’t?) the answer awaits.

Here’s a sample from the sixth movement, as composed by Beethoven and as performed by the University of NSW Orchestra in Sydney:

More samples on the web page linked above.

For some reason, Australians love mucking about with this song. Andrew Denton’s 1992 TV Show “The Money or the Gun” produced a new version each week, by such Aussie luminaries as Rolf Harris, John Paul Young and a memorable spokenm-word performance by Leonard Teale. The CD is still available.

Russian news agency Interfax reports that the wreckage of an “alien technical device” has been found at the site of the 1908 Tunguska explosion in Siberia.

Today’s the last parliamentary sitting day in the current session and, if the pundits are right, the last day before the election. This is from the Senate order of business (”the Red”):

Government business – notice of motion –
No. 4 – Minister for the Environment and Heritage (Senator Ian Campbell) – First reading of the Marriage Amendment Bill 2004 (debate to proceed immediately if agreed to)

So the Straight Australia Bill will, barring an upset, pass through our national parliament today, supported by an unholy coalition of cowardly politicians, religious nutters and hate merchants.

It’s a black day for decency, tolerance and the fair go, and today’s actions will have far-reaching effects on our national psyche and the status of queers in this country. Just you wait and see. For the first time in decades, a law is being passed which retracts, rather than extends, our civil rights.

Hopefully the debate will be at least interesting. I’ll listen in and post any observations that I come up with.

Meantime, this letter should be in today’s Sydney Star Observer:

My boyfriend and I are getting married in Canada on September 25 and no-one is going to take that away from us. John Howard can get fucked. Mark Latham can get fucked. George Bush, Pope John Paul II, Fred Nile, George Pell, Phillip Jensen, Alan Jones, Miranda Devine, Piers Akerman, Brian Harradine and Phillip Ruddock can all get fucked.

Paul Kidd